


Instagram

by thisisntreallymeimnotreallyhere



Category: Supernatural
Genre: First Kiss, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Love Confessions, M/M, Pining Dean
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-09
Updated: 2016-12-09
Packaged: 2018-09-07 11:48:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8799682
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thisisntreallymeimnotreallyhere/pseuds/thisisntreallymeimnotreallyhere
Summary: Dean accidentally leaves a sappy comment on Cas' Instagram photo, but the fall out isn't as bad as he thinks it's going to be.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I posted this on Tumblr but no one liked it or reblogged it, and since I'm a narcissist at heart I decided to cross post it here on Ao3. Also, I think it's good? Like, I think I'm improving, at least. So, I hope someone enjoys it. :)

Dean isn’t used to coming home to an empty apartment. Usually his roommate and best friend, Cas, is there to greet him as soon as he walks in. Dean closes and locks the door behind him and, out of habit, looks over to the corner of the couch where Cas usually sits. He notices that Cas left his book propped open on the arm of the couch, no doubt because he lost his bookmark somewhere. There’s a blanket draped haphazardly against the cushions because Cas can’t be bothered to fold it when he’s done. It’s Cas’ favorite place in their tiny apartment and it shows.

Dean’s favorite spot is in a chair across the room where he can peek at Cas out of the corner of his eye when they’re watching TV together.

“Well,” Dean says to the empty apartment. “I guess it’s just you and me tonight.” He wastes no time changing into sweatpants and a t-shirt, and reheating some leftovers for dinner. Within 20 minutes he’s sitting in his chair, drinking a beer and catching up on his Netflix queue. Any other night, Dean would be content to have complete control of the remote control, but this isn’t any other night. He keeps glancing at Cas’ empty spot across the room. Before he can second guess himself he takes out his phone and sends a text to Cas.

Dean:  _ hey, how’s it going? _

Cas:  _ It’s not that bad. Thanks for checking in! _

Dean smiles to himself as he remembers the email conversation that he and Cas had that afternoon. Apparently, one of Cas’ coworkers got promoted so some people from Cas’ office were going out to celebrate. Ever the introvert, Cas emailed Dean to see if he could come up with an excuse to back out of it. Dean had pushed him to go out and socialize, despite his tendency to be a homebody.

“You don’t have to stay that long, Cas,” Dean had reasoned with him. “You might even enjoy yourself.”

So Cas had gone out with his coworkers and was apparently enjoying himself. But Dean had been fooled before.

Dean:  _ you didn’t make an excuse to stay behind at the office did you? _

Cas:  _ No, Dean. _

Dean:  _ you’re not hiding in the bathroom are you? _

Cas:  _ No, Dean _

And to prove his point Cas sent him a picture of himself with Hannah and Gabe, all three laughing and having a good time. Dean notices the empty pint glasses scattered around the table. It looks like they were having a very good time. Dean actually laughs out loud at the goofy grin on Cas’ face.

Dean:  _ glad you’re having fun! make sure you take a cab home. _

Cas:  _ Yes, Dean. :) _

Dean grabs a pack of beer from the fridge and settles in for a long night. He plans on staying up until Cas gets home but he can feel himself start to drift off after his third beer. The TV continues to play in the background but he isn’t really paying attention anymore. He pulls out his phone again to text Cas but decides against it.

Dean has been in this spot before. He’s tired and a little drunk and missing Cas, and the temptation is there to tell Cas how he really feels. How he thinks that Cas is the best person in the world, and how much he loves him. In his hazy daydreams, Dean imagines that Cas will immediately come home and confess his mutual attraction to Dean and they’ll have a Hollywood-worthy makeout session. But if real life has taught Dean anything it’s that he is not living in a romcom. Dean would probably make Cas uncomfortable with his confession. Cas could decide to move out. Hell, Cas could even go so far as to decide that it wasn’t worth being friends anymore. No, Dean realized a long time ago that if he wanted to keep Cas in his life he would have to keep quiet about his feelings.

Instead of texting Cas he decides to browse Instagram instead. It’s a new app that Sammy helped him figure out. Dean isn’t very good at it, but Sam had taught him enough so that he can like his friend’s photos, and sometimes post photos of his own. There’s a new photo from Charlie, posting a photo of herself in some new, exotic location. A little further down is a picture from Claire that looks artsy. Dean doesn’t really understand what he’s supposed to like about it, but he double taps anyway. Eventually, he finds himself looking at a picture that Cas has posted.

It was the picture that Cas had sent to Dean earlier. The picture is cropped so that the pint glasses were no longer in the frame, there’s a heavy filter on it, and it’s captioned, “Congratulations on your promotion, Hannah!” Dean takes another sip of his beer and continues to stare at the photo. Cas looks so handsome in that blue shirt, but more than that he looks happy. God, Dean thinks, he looks so happy and sexy and perfect.

Dean double taps the photo but can’t bring himself to scroll past it. He decides that he’s going to leave a comment. He starts to write something super sappy but decides against it. He can feel the rational part of his brain raising all kinds of red flags, but the beer-addled side is telling him that everything is going to be fine.

“It’s just Cas,” he reasons to himself. “He’s my friend.”

So Dean writes what he thinks is a very nice comment before he can second guess himself. Chuckling at his bravery, he takes a screenshot of the picture before he closes the app. He pulls the picture up again in his recent photos and crops everything else away except Cas’ face. He doesn’t have to explain himself to anyone. He can do anything he wants to do on his phone and no one will know. The picture is the last thing that he sees before he falls asleep.

\-----

The next morning he wakes up with a crick in his neck. Did he slept in the living room? He sits up, stretching away the aches, and notices that someone had covered him with a blanket at some point during the night. Good, that means that Cas made it home safe.

Cas…

The events of last night started coming back to him slowly. He was looking at Cas’ photo before he fell asleep... he had left a comment on Cas’ Instagram photo….

“Shit,” Dean curses, diving for his phone. He can’t remember what he actually wrote. “Don’t panic.” Maybe he left a comment that could be passed off as something that a drunk person would say to his best friend? He opened the Instagram app and pulled up Cas’ profile. Much to his horror, he realizes that it’s worse than he thought.

_ God you’re beautiful. I wish I could kiss you. _

Dean’s brain flatlines. This is bad. This is very, very bad.

“Don’t panic,” he repeats to himself even though it doesn’t seem to be helping. Cas hasn’t responded to his comment so maybe he hasn’t seen it yet? Dean quickly deletes the comment before any lasting damage can be done. Instead of sitting in the living room waiting for Cas to come find him, Dean decides that the best thing to do will be to hide in his room.

He barely closes the door behind him when his phone buzzes with a notification. Glancing at the screen, he sees that it’s a text from Cas. He takes a deep breath to steady himself before he reads what Cas has to say.

Cas:  _ Good morning, Dean. Would you like to go out for brunch? _

No, Dean thinks to himself, he really wouldn’t. Brunch would be in a public place, it would be a safe place for Cas to give him “the talk,” and that would be the end of that. Dean would prefer to live in denial, to hang onto his daydream for a little longer. So he composes an answer and sends it to Cas before he can second guess himself.

Dean:  _ feeling under the weather. go ahead without me _

He doesn’t have to wait very long for a response.

Cas:  _ OK _

It’s short, and there’s a lot that Dean could read into that one word, but he tries not to. Cas would have mentioned something if he was angry, right? He would have insisted that Dean join him, would have forced the issue if there was a problem. Right? Dean decides that the best course of action would be to ignore the situation until things got back to normal.

He hears some shuffling outside of his door but he stubbornly stays where he was. Eventually he hears Cas leave the apartment. He opens the door and peeks his head out.

“Cas?” he calls, just to make sure that Cas isn’t still here. He doesn’t get an answer and he doesn’t hear any movement in the apartment so he decides that it’s safe to come out. He makes his way to the kitchen and drinks a large glass of water. He’s just starting to brew the coffee when, to his surprise, he hears the front door open. He spins around to see Cas rushing past the kitchen.

“I forgot my credit card,” Cas explains on his way down the hallway without even looking at Dean.

So it’s worse than he thought. Dean considers making a mad dash back to his own bedroom but there’s the danger of colliding with Cas in the hallway. That would turn the uncomfortable feeling up to eleven so he decides against it. Instead, he looks around the kitchen to see if there’s anywhere to hide. He briefly considers hiding in the cupboards but decides that he doesn’t have enough time to get the pots out of the way. No, he’s just going to have to stand here and wait for Cas to leave. Hopefully Cas will decide not to confront him before he has a chance to drink his coffee.

Soon enough he hears Cas walking back down the hallway toward the front of the apartment. Dean turns his back to the doorway in the hopes that it will look like he’s preoccupied with the coffee machine. Maybe Cas will take pity on him and just keep walking. But Dean hears Cas stop in the doorway of the kitchen, Dean feels Cas staring at the back of his head. He isn’t sure what’s worse, the silence that drags on and on, or the prospect of Cas speaking and breaking his heart.

“Dean?” Cas gently calls from the doorway.

Dean takes a deep breath before responding.

“Yeah, Cas?” he replies without turning around.

“Are you sure you don’t want to come with me?”

Cas’ voice is soft, and Dean can almost see the pleading expression on his face. Damn him and his blue eyes! Dean is in danger of giving in, but then he remembers how much he has to lose.

“I think… I think I’m just gonna stay here, Cas,” he answers, barely turning his head to look over his shoulder at his best friend.

Out of the corner of his eye he sees Cas start to walk towards him. His movements are slow, as if Cas doesn’t want to spook him. He stops when he’s within arm's reach of Dean. There’s another drawn out silence during which Dean can hear Cas starting to speak once or twice but deciding against whatever it is he wants to say. He just keeps standing there looking at Dean. Finally, Cas seems to make up his mind.

“You know,” he says, his voice much softer than it had been before, if that’s even possible. “Sometimes I want to kiss you, too.”

Dean is too startled to speak. He whips around so fast that ends up standing face-to-face with Cas before he can stop himself. For the first time all morning he gets a good look at Cas’ face. It looks like it always does but there’s an expression on his face that Dean has never seen before. It was soft and affectionate and… a little scared?

“Really?” Dean tries to ask but his voice cracks. He clears his throat and tries again. “Really?”

Cas moves toward him slowly but deliberately. Dean can tell that Cas is watching his reaction and is getting ready to pull away if Dean so much as flinches. But Dean stands there, still as a statue, as his best friend moves into his personal space. Cas shifts his weight, tilts his head, and leans in to place a kiss on Dean’s cheek.

Cas is so close that Dean can smell his scent. He can feel the heat from his body as Cas takes a step closer, but not too close. Dean closes his eyes and relishes in the affection, relaxing into Cas’ touch, as small as it is. He turns his head just so, so that his lips barely touch Cas’ cheek. He thinks he feels Cas shiver as he exhales against his neck. Still, Dean doesn’t reach for Cas. He doesn’t know where Cas wants to draw the line, so Dean takes this moment and commits it to memory in case this is all he ever gets.

Eventually Cas pulls back but doesn’t step away. Dean can tell that something has shifted between them. Cas’ expression still had a twinge of fear, but it’s slowly being taken over by excitement. God, Dean wants him. If Cas leaves now Dean will never recover.

“Yes,” Cas whispers, and Dean can feel the breath against his lips. He notices how Cas’ eyes followed the movement of his mouth as he licks his lips in anticipation. This is it, the edge that Dean has been scared of falling over. But instead of losing Cas it looks like Cas was going to fall with him.

“We can make that happen,” Dean whispers back.

Cas can't seem to take his eyes off of Dean’s lips. All Cas has to do is shuffle closer and he’s pressed flush against Dean. Acting on instinct, Dean reaches out and gently places his hands on Cas’ hips. Everything still feels so fragile, like it’ll break apart if he grabs too quickly or too tightly. Cas must feel the same way because he touches the small of Dean’s back with gentle fingers. It’s enough to pull Dean closer, though.

As close as they are, they aren't close enough. Cas' mouth is hovering so close to Dean's but Cas can’t seem to work up the courage to lean in the rest of the way. Dean can feel the shivers running along Cas’ skin even under his shirt. One day Dean hopes to feel those shivers without anything between them, but first they need to get past this. Cas has brought them this far, Dean can take them the rest of the way.

He leans in and presses his lips to Cas’.

Dean knows one thing for sure about his life. He isn’t living in a Hollywood style romcom, but he’ll take this life with Cas over any other version of his life without Cas.


End file.
